i know that sounds so cliche and well, stupid. but that saying about roses having thorns is so true. when i look at falling in love and how grand one feels when they are in that place of love and feeling totally high off it,. only then to face the pain later on of the reality of life. life after being in love. why does it have to be like that? i mean even marriage has this "thorn ' side to the beauty of having somone who wanted you intheir life so badly they swore to it in front of all your friends and family. only to advance ten yrs or so and find yourself struggling to even just give them a kiss let alone f them. the one person that ten yrs ago you couldnt get enough off. you would lose sleep bc you were too busy making out and screwing every night. that someone that you had to talk to everyday- now you cant get far enough away from them!!! my god why does this happen?? oh i hear "you have grown apart,it happens, " "time takes away from those lovey dovey feeling and you end up just friends, married friends". well i dont know too many bff's that want to kiss each other or delight in the after glo of a great night of sex with each other . i just dont understand how this happens or why but i hate it!! i feel like i have been poked by a million thorns and i stil cant get past it. where is that high feeling i once i had? what happend to wanting him around all the time and being so happy when we were to gether??? maybe i am just cursed. that's it. i am not able to obtain and hold onto that deep love bc i have been cursed.
well, maybe i just dont know how to hang onto love. ugh